u have not changed one bit dude.. everytime i try to move on, u always end up making me think and get upset over u. i was happily making new friends in rp. chatting with a bunch of ppl.. tryna get to know them.. n den u came online.. started talkin to me.. or should i say flirting? since u were so bored..u decided to call me.. of cos..i could have ignored or rejected the call.. but both u n i know..tt i wuld nvr be able to do so.. picking up ur calls have always been my mistake.. but for some weird reason, i can't seem to stop myself from pickin up de phone.. WHY? why do ur calls affect me so much? why does everything u do affect me? after so many yrs, u still have tt impact on me.. so what if i ans the phone? no biggie..it's only u.. but once i hear ur voice.. i go blank.. it's lyk i'm in some new world.. i'm listening to u..talkin abt urself..as usual.. it's always abt u.. when has it ever been abt me? u chat..i listen...i reply..u listen..n we laugh.. on the surface, i seem to be laughing at ur jokes.. look real deep..u'll see that i'm laughin at myself.. laughing at how stupid i am.. why can't i seem to get over u? i keep telling myself tt i'm over u.. hidin my feelings from every1.. i wanna move on, meet new ppl..perhaps maybe even find the right guy for me.. but u..ur face..ur voice..it jus haunts me.. thx to u, i feel lyk i would nvr be good enough for any1.. which is y i'm always avoiding contact with guys.. my friends r always tryna intro me to guys, hoping that i may find the right one.. but i'm so through with all this shit.. relationships have been a pain in my ass for many yrs.. do i look lyk i have faith in being in a relationship?? yea sure..well fuck it! u call me up whenever u are bored.. since i'm always there to listen to u.. even when i'm busy, i still listen to u.. but when u're busy, i become invisible.. i wanna ask u to go screw urself..to not call me.. i wanna delete u from my msn contacts.. i wanna have ZERO contact with u.. but i can't.. i jus can't.. damnit.
